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CD 9 - Envy

Reviews: - 2004 - 2005

CD9 Description

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This review also refers to CD 4, CD 6, and CD 10

Dear Mistress,

Your website and services have had an incredible effect on me over the past year. i started with the Male Charm CD, then Happiness, Envy, and Vixen. i wanted to be obsessed with cock and cum when i started being hypnotized, but the obsession has become greater than i ever imagined. It has gotten to the point where I want to quit my job and become a hooker, sucking men's cocks and swallowing their cum for money all day long. All i can think about is having a cock explode with cum in my mouth and ass.

After much debating with myself, i have finally ordered the Youth CD. i am scared and incredibly turned on at the same time. i want nothing more than to have big boobs so i can be an even better bimbo and attract more cocks. i don't know what to do about my friends, family, and job if and when i grow breasts. Any suggestions would be much appreciated.

i can't wait until i have a set of my own big tits!

Sincerely Yours,


Lisa <kccumaddict@excite.com>
Kansas City, MO USA - Sunday, May 09, 2004 at 23:45:38 (EDT)

This review also refers to CD 4 and CD 10

It's been awhile since I posted to the site, so I thought I'd share what's been happening.

For about 2 years I have been struggling with resisting but not being able to get away from this site or Mind Mistress. I was so captivated when I 1st came here but then realixed I better try and get away before MM really takes a hold of me. Of course, I couldn't and kept coming back again and again. Talking to Mistress Linda, ordering her CD's and falling deeper and deeper into her grip.... all the while thinking this is just highly erotic fantasy. So many in the channel who I adore have helped in so many ways.

I finally had some sessions with Mistress Linda and they were so awesome. She really took hold of me like she had bee enticing and seducing me for years getting me ready for this. Well, she ended up casting a spell on me and made a wax doll image of me. She added 2 big round pieces of wax on my chest and told me that this was the new me and that sharlene will take full control now. She also made me beg her to make it real, permanent and forever. I did and she did. She said I was now her shemale slut. I found this highly erotic but still didn't think a whole lot about it.

Well, I have realized that I came to this site on purpose when I was ready to let my gender dysphoria out and embrace it. Just took awhile due to having to stuff it far down throughout life.

I now need to be a gorgeous knockout woman more than ever. I am embracing my transsexuality now and feel compulsed to have my body be that of a gorgeous transsexual. I need at least D-Cup breasts and a nice squeezable butt and pair of lucious hips.

I have realized that this is at my core and is my true need at my deepest levels. I am now accepting this so much more and loving it. When my mind thinks what the hell am I doing, I realize that sharlene is in control and is doing with me what she has wanted to do for oh so long. The hypnosis just helped me to realize, accept and give into it. I do need some more sessions with Mistress.... badly.

I have been feminizing so much more now. I'm almost through with permanently removing my hand and finger hairs and am about to start concentrating on a new place to work on. I really hate body hair! :)It is so different now and hormones will give me the woman's body I so badly need.

And cock.... mmmmmm I am irresistably attracted to cock now. Mistress is making me a straight girl. My sexual attraction to women has diminished alot although I still have an insatiable desire to be them when I see them or see them sucking cock or getting pounded in movies and pics. yoah..... what a turn on.


sharlene <sharlene_fem@yahoo.com>
- Tuesday, May 25, 2004 at 01:05:04 (EDT)

This review also refers to CD 3, CD 4, and CD 10

Hi everyone :). I just want to give a little review of how my feminization is progressing. As someone down the page said you can't be hypnotized to do something you don't want to do. I don't really know if that is true because in my case it has helped me to do and feel things which I've always wanted to and fantasized about. After all I imagine that the reason most of us are here in the first place is that somewhere within each of us are the desires which the cds help us to aquire and develop.

I can't believe how well a few sessions with Mind Mistress and listening to cds has changed me. Elegance got me started and has worked well enough that I don't listen to it much anymore. I'm constantly drawn to wearing blush, lipstick, clear nail polish, perfume, mascara, and even eybrow gel on my semi plucked brows. As each of these things is applied I get more and more excited and love how much prettier I look. I feel so sexy and horny that it's like I'm becoming a transvestite again, except the desire to be made up doesn't leave me if I should climax. It just makes me feel happy to be more of a girl and happy that I'm the transexual I am. In fact I just came back up to this paragraph as after writing all of this I had to make up my face.

Next came Vixen, Male Charm, and Envy which have helped me to become more at ease with the feelings I've always had of wanting to be a woman. I say "helped me" rather than "made me" because I knew that's what I wanted to do, but it was just so hard to break the decades of living, conditioning, and natural instincts that controlled my thoughts and desires. Nowadays when I look at a woman it's not with lust, but to appraise and envy them for their breasts, figures, derrieres, etc... Nice tight ladies jeans help to give me the appearance of having a girlish rear end and the makeup helps my face. The biggest change though is that I now have such a desire to have a cock in me, just typing and thinking about it has me squirming in my chair. Also every once in awhile I'll drive or walk past a man somewhere and I'll start to become aroused.

This also not something that I did not want to have happen, it's something I've dreamed of for years. Sexually I've always been a sub who desired to be taken by my partner and that's pretty much how most of my sexual experience has been, albeit mostly with women. I have been picked up by men a few times in the past but was always drinking when it happened and never even thought of doing that when sober. Afterwards I would always feel guilty and lose the desire just like when I would dress. Now I don't drink much at all and I dream about cocks all through the day and find it hard to believe that once I was actually attracted to women's vaginas. The only way I'd want to have one of them again is after surgery. :) I still haven't gotten out to meet some men, but practice now and then with a thick 6" long dildo I bought. Sucking on it gets me so horny and starts my mouth to watering so much the dildo slides in and out of my mouth so slick and smooth as I move my head up and down. When I pull my head up off of it I pretend that the string of saliva connecting me to it is really cum it's shot into my mouth. :) I can't wait to taste someone's come for real again, other than my own which I lap up from my palm after bringing myself to climax. If any of you have never tasted cum, even your own, you don't know what you're missing. I know that it looks a little gross, but just suck it in fast the way you would a bitter cough medicine. Like most things, the second time is easier and much more pleasureable.

Well that's what I've been up to so far this year. Thank you all for being here and posting such interesting accounts and stories. And thank You to Mind Mistress for giving us all the opportunity. best wishes! geri

geri <geri_in_ri@yahoo.com>
w warwick, ri usa - Friday, April 22, 2005 at 22:00:54 (EDT)

This review also refers to CD 3, CD 4, and CD 10

Dear Mistress, In your e-mail to me dated 04/13/05, you said that you enjoyed hearing personal stories about the effects of the CDs. So, I've decided to drop you a line to give you an update on how I am being affected. For you info and following your recommendation, I have just recieved my fourth CD–Vixen, which follows Elegance, Male Charm and Envy, in that order.

Before getting Envy two months ago, I wasn't even sure that I was actually going into trance. You felt that I was probably going into light to medium trance. Well, after a constant dose of ENVY, coupled with continuing to listen to Elegance, I have no doubt that I am now easily going into trance. This whole thing started several months ago because I became intrigued by your website and was very curious about what you said in your CDs and how you said it. I can now say that the CDs are having a profound effect on my personality and perception of myself. I am changing and now thinking and doing things that, four months ago, I would not have contemplated doing. I am noticeably more submissive and less decisive. More and more, I seem to be deferring to and wanting others to make decisions for me.

Elegance is very subversive and the suggestions just build and build inside of you with every exposure, until you mentally give into the pressure. Giving into one suggestion makes it easier to make a second change, then a third, and so on. I fine myself making changes to myself–feminizing changes–that are not even mentioned in the CD. I manage a small reail shop outside of Washington, DC–just some part-time employees and myself. After about 2 weeks of Elegance, I finally gave into the desire to start wearing a feminine fragrance. However, being afraid that I would immediately be noticed wearing a woman's perfume, I decided on Avon Naturals Body Spray. The scents are quite light, but up close are distinctively feminine. That satisfied me for about a week, but then I got antsy again. I got it in my mind that my lips were to thin and boring. So, I started using Body Inventions "Lip Explosion", which is a lip plumper and also a clear gloss. With it, I also used Avon "Beyond Color" Plumping Lip Conditioner in a neutral shade to somewhat mute the shine of the "Lip Explosion". I must admit, my lips are now fuller. Then, after a couple more weeks, I decided that my eyebrows looked to bushy and I started to gradually shape them. It seemed that I could never quite get them right. So, I went and got a Remington Precision Eyebrow Trimmer and trimmed them to 2 mm, then plucked and played with them until now they are defined and quite feminine in shape. Since I wear glasses most of the time, I was able to cover their feminine appearance by-and-large. Then, three weeks ago, I got it in my head that my glass frames were too masculine, so I ordered a new pair of presciption lenses, this time with woman's frames. Now, my brows are more visible because of the smaller, more delicate frames. Several women, including one of my part-time ladies, commented that they liked my new glasses. I'm guessing that most people just accept them as unisex in style. Next came panties (which I now wear at work every day along with a gaff, so I look totally flat in front), shaping my dark brunette pubic bush, shaving my underarms and the hair on my legs. I have now started to wear woman's jewelry–ladies watches that are not totally feminine, bracelets and necklaces that are more ornate and delicate than a man would wear, and elegant but not overly feminine rings. No, I haven't gotten my ears pierced yet. My fingernails are now longer and nicely shaped. So far, I still haven't convinced myself to wear blush or mascara out in public. But right now, I'm starting to think that some light blush wouldn't be too noticeable. It is tempting.

About a month after I purchased Elegance, I got Male Charm. At first, I couldn't get into the "swing of things" with the CD. Why I ordered it, I'm still not sure. Even now, I still don't believe that I'm gay. All of my sexual relationships in the past have been with females. Anyway, initially, the CD was fun, but I was not the participant, but rather, more like a floating observer–hovering above the activity and watching. I must admit, that even as an observer, I got really turned on. That all changed when I started listening to Envy about two months ago. Now, when I go back to Male Charm, I actually do become "Cassie", but I haven't been able to experience orgasm as a female, yet. Perhaps Vixen, the CD I just recieved, will help that along.

Your Envy CD has really had an affect on me. I listen to it almost nightly and sometimes with Elegance, sometimes with Male Charm. I don't know which CD is the cause, but over the past two months, I have purchased a lot of woman's clothing and started wearing them to work–especially women's jeans, tops and loafers. I have been careful to make sure that I don't look too noticeably feminine. I've developed almost a total unisex look. I know that I'm starting to walk a fine line–sort of balancing my strange, new urges against displaying them too obviously. However, just knowing that I'm wearing female clothing in public, for some reason, gives me immense pleasure. Envy has been very effective in changing how I look at women–especially attractive women. Yes, I have in fact, become extremely jealous of them. It seems that I have become especially jealous of women with great looking hair, and those with rounded, shapely feminine bottoms and a thin waist. Lately, I seem to be always fantasizing about having a thin waist; a firm sexy butt; wide feminine hips; rounded thighs and a totally flat crouch. But, believe it or not, I don't ever picture myself having big breasts, but rather firm, well shaped, perky ones. On a subscious level, I recently caught my reflection in a store window and noticed that I was swinging my hips more as I walk–and I didn't even know I was doing it. As I write this at my shop, I am wearing faded Calvin Klein Easy Fit woman's jeans, a berry-heather color L.L.Bean women's mock turtleneck shirt; and burgundy Bass Casell women's penny loafers. My waist is currently 30 inches and is just a tiny bit snug in my Size 10 jeans. I am only 5'6'' tall, with a small to medium build, and I currently weigh 140 lbs. Since I first started listening to Envy two months ago, I've lost 12 lbs, and I have it in my mind to lose another 10 lbs. and 2" off my waist, which would allow me to get into Size 8 jeans. Perhaps, my next CD after Vixen should be Corset Diet. I know it sounds goofy, but I just felt immense pleasure telling you what I am wearing at this moment.

On another issue, Envy, along with Male Charm, have really thrown me into confusion not only concerning my gender idenity, but also concerning my feeling about men. I can never remember being attracted to men in a sexual way before. But that definitely seems to be changing. I've had no sexual relations with a women since I started listening to Envy. Now, I am finding myself actually flirting with good-looking delivery drivers and even some handsome customers that come into the shop. I've noticed that when I see a good looking or well built man, I catch myself wondering what he looks like naked, how big his cock is and even how heavy he would feel laying on top of me between my widely spread thighs. I even bought a pheromone product called "Passion Copulin Concentrate for Women", a fragrance & pheromone mixture supposedly great for attracting men. When I look at prono now on the web, I look for sites offering conventional sex between a man and a woman, but I'm only interested in pictures or videos where the woman is a dark haired brunette, that I think would resemble a "female me". Then I masturbate while fantasizing that I am she–that I'm the one actually sucking his cock; that I'm the one being mounted; that it's my own real vagina that's being fucked. I'm always being fucked bareback–never with a condom–so I can feel his cum being pumped into me. I even fantasize about getting pregnant. But I only fantasize that I'm having sex with a man as a woman, never as a man.

That brings me to now. I've recently ordered and recieved 100mg Spironolactone anti-androgen tablets and 1mg Estrofem estradiol estrogen tablets (which come in a cute round pill dispenser , just like birth control pills–how appropriate). I can't believe I actually ordered them. My thinking was that I could just take enough female hormones to give me a little feminine development without going too far. Maybe take only 1/2 mg or 1 mg of Estrofem a day instead of the 2 mg recommended for pre-op transsexuals. Same with the anti-androgen. Anyway, it's not like I couldn't stop, if I wanted to. Still, I haven't taken any yet. In fact, about a week ago right after they were delivered, I actually threw the whole lot into the trash one night. I guess I got into a mood about how stupid I was acting–your CDs, the female clothing, the jewelry and perfume, etc., etc. Well, I fetched the pills out of the trash first thing the next morning–right before the trash truck came. I guess my funky mood had passed because that evening I listened to Elegance, Envy, Male Charm and then Envy again, one right after the other, in that order. It took up the entire evening. Anyway, the pills are still there...calling to me. Don't know what I'll do with them at this. Guess I need someone to force me to take them.

So that's my story for now. It is now evident to me that your CDs, your website, the animations, all of it are extremely effective–more so than I ever thought possible. At first, I thought I was playing a mind game with myself; now, I find that it is much more serious and, yes, much more pleasurable than I ever imagined. Your voice, tone and inflections are absolutely perfect. I thought about getting Elegance II, you know, to sort of build on Elegance I. But the idea of an "all of a sudden" change, i.e., breast implants, seems unnatural to me, plus breast implants don't do anything for developing a sexy feminine tush.

Well, I'm sorry for being so long winded. You must hear this story a hundred times a month. Thank you so much for listening.

Your devoted admirer, Cassie

Cassie 6/8/2005 9:35 PM classicw@NOSPAMbellatlantic.net

This review also refers to CD 7

Hi, girls!

i just wanted to share with all of you another fabulous training idea that Mistress has been employing on me. After a really wonderful session two weeks ago, She told me to listen to both CD7 Youth and CD9 Envy in the same day every day until she commanded otherwise. Well, my dears! For someone who wants to be a female this is the most confirming experience ever. For those little doubts, hesitations and rebellions left, this is the ultimate spell. She already had me lusting for men all the time after Male Charm and several very powerful sessions, but Envy really seals your desire for them permanently. Then on top of that, She has created a spell to help you grow your own breasts by reviving old memories from the subconscious with Youth. This one may work a little slower, but it is having to fight your natural body. Still, i can say it is winning. i feel my breast buds growing, they are more sensitive and i am picking out and wearing bras now. Thanks to Mistress, i feel so feminine now, i can only look at men with desire and want to seek more ways to be feminine. i will listen to these two CDs every day until She says otherwise.

Oh, and if you haven't done so yet, please also visit and join the HypnoticWishes Yahoo group (groups.yahoo.com/group/hypnoticwishes/). Mistress' Mad Scientist assistant Alice is very nice and interesting, and she has worked hard to get a dynamic group going. It's well worth your time if you really want to serve Mistress!

gwen_thomas <guenedthomas@NOSPAMearthlink.net>
Alabama USA - Friday, October 14, 2005 at 14:24:06 (EDT)

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